Yeah. You read that title right. Starting a blog really is a lot like answering a personals ad. In honor of Valentine’s Day (and Singles Awareness Day), there’s no better time to make the correlation between blogging and online dating. Both can be really rewarding – and a little bit frustrating at times. Both involve the struggle to stand out amid tons of competition and are frequently marked by a few epic stumbles along the way.
Here are four ways that illustrate how blogging is reminiscent of online dating. Woven in with these metaphorical constructs are some practical tips to help you succeed at blogging. (You’re on your own with tips for succeeding at dating. Sorry.)
Tip #1: Know Who You Want to Get With (or In Front Of)
There are almost as many blogs on the web as there are online dating profiles. And well, there’s something for everybody out there – but it’s a matter of reaching the right audience and the right people. In order to do that, you need to know who you want to get with… Or get in front of.
With a number of dating sites that cater from everything from young singles to clown aficionados (seriously) to sites that can help you hook your very own sugar daddy or sugar momma, clearly there are a lot of dating sites geared towards helping people find that special someone who speaks to their heart.
While some of these online dating sites sound a bit “out there,” they’re on to something: They know their niche and know how to cater to them. Your blog should do the same thing. Know who your blog is geared towards and actively write for them. Do some research and optimize accordingly to get in front of this audience to make your perfect match. You’re writing about fashion for professional-yet-quirky 30-somethings? Speak their language! If you’re writing about indie rock on the East coast, understand what’s popular with your audience and use your knowledge of those topics to get their eyeballs on your blog.
While you may be able to bank on your existing knowledge and thirst for trends in your blogging niche, there are some tried n’ true research tactics you can use to learn more about what readers want. Using free tools like Google Adwords can help you optimize your posts for keywords and see the monthly search volume around specific terms. This lets you know how often people are searching for a specific keyword phrase, giving you the opportunity to increase your odds of bringing people to your optimized blog.
You can also check your blog’s Google Analytics profile to see which posts are getting the most visits, how long people are ogling your saucy little blog, and checking out your comments to see how they are engaging with it. This will let you know what’s working and give you a clue as to which direction to keep going. (Don’t have a Google Analytics account for your blog yet? No problem! Check out this AmpliFound article to see how you can get set up!)
Tip #2: Put Your Best (Blogging) Self Forward
There’s a lot of competition out there in the blogosphere. Even if you’ve got that extra something special about your blog, you’re going to be scraping for the attention of readers across the web. There are plenty of fish in the sea, but the question is: Do you want them to “swipe right” or “swipe left” on your blog?
If you’re looking at your blog from the metaphorical standpoint of getting a date, you’re going to have to employ some of the same tactics that folks on dating sites use:
Image matters: Make use of attractive photography.
Take a good look at the personals ads you’d want to answer. Chances are, they all feature photos that show the person in their best possible light. They’re having fun. Smiling. Engaging with others in a natural, completely un-forced setting. When applied to your blog, this is something to keep in mind for your blog’s imagery. This applies to your blog’s layout and design, photos that appear in posts, and your author photograph that serves as your public face. Images matter. Even the most literate of blog readers appreciates the importance of beautiful visuals to amplify their user experience.
Remember: Much like social media and online personals ads, there is no room for duckface on your blog.
Be yourself and be an original.
It’s your blog. Be yourself. Too many blogs (and dating profiles) say the same things and don’t really stand out. How many dating profiles have you seen that contain a list of likes that include “long walks on the beach, candlelight dinners, and puppies”? Yeah. I thought so. As you would refrain from adding “safe” answers to simple questions in a personals ad, your blog shouldn’t shy away from shaking things up. Think about what you have that’s unique to offer. Your blog tackles a subject you’re passionate about. Show that passionate side of yourself to your readers!
Don’t give up the goods right away.
As is the case when you’re digging through dating prospects, you don’t want to give them the full monty of who you are right out of the gate. While pictures shared on Snapchat aren’t appropriate fodder for an online dating profile, you should also proceed with caution when writing blog posts that may paint you in a less-than-positive light. Test the waters of your blog and audience first. See what readers are comfortable with and if you’re at the risk of oversharing.
Additionally, if you’re a hobby blogger and in the market for changing jobs, ask yourself if this is something your employer – or even your parents – would be okay with. Not all sides of you should be made public. Some things are better left for your personal diary than they are for your blog. (Unless you’re famous. Then, pretty much all bets are off.)
Tip #3: Spoiler Alert: You May Meet Some Weirdos or Stalkers
You may know who your intended audience may be, but unfortunately, there are always some less-than-savory characters lurking online. Dating online can be a precarious proposition in that you never know if that hunky dreamboat you just “swiped right” on has more in common with Patrick Bateman from American Psycho than Ryan Gosling in The Notebook. Similarly, you may find some trolls among your blog’s readership who may span the gamut from garden variety pot-stirrers to seriously disturbed individuals.
At some point, every blogger will have a bad experience with a reader. This makes it all the more important to be proactive in protecting yourself. You wouldn’t give your home address to someone you just met on a dating site, right? Well, make sure you protect your privacy online and be judicious with what you post about yourself on your blog in order to keep yourself and your family safe.
Take precautions beforehand to not offer up too much personal information or your whereabouts that may make it easy for someone to track you down. On a much less scary note, make sure to have backups of your blog in case it gets hacked, too. A little bit of foresight can help keep things fun and safe!
Tip #4: Not Every One (of your posts) Will Be a Winner
Everyone who’s ever answered a personals ad understands that not every date will be a winner. In the vein of Tip #2, putting your best (blogging) self forward, not every single one of your dates will disclose to you that they are a narcoleptic amputee before you meet up with them. (Hey. It happens to the best of us. And that narcoleptic amputee you just met online may be your soulmate if you give her a chance, dude.)
To paraphrase Missy Elliot, “pull that thing down, flip it and reverse it,” and apply this concept to your blog. Not every post you write will be a winner. Not every post will go viral. Chances are, 99 out of 100 blog posts you write may not go viral. However, that shouldn’t stop you from trying to write something great every time you sit down to your keyboard. Moreover, it shouldn’t stop you from sitting down to your keyboard to write regularly, either.
As is the case with online dating, you can’t let one bad date put you off to the whole game. And in terms of blogging, you can’t get discouraged if you’re not gaining readers. Take a moment, regroup and consider what types of readers you’re trying to attract. Maybe you reconfigure your strategy to better balance creating new posts with actively promoting them, too. Every date and every blog post you write is a learning experience and a chance to connect.
So, what’s your sign, baby? How long have you been blogging? Have you had any blogging experiences that can be likened to a (good or bad) date? Any advice for aspiring bloggers ready to take the plunge? We’d love for you to share your thoughts in the comments below!
